On Being Targeted

Hello good people~

Yesterday I spent the beginning of my Therapy session huddled on the floor under a pile of blankets. I see a somatic therapist so a big part of what we do is following the shape that the body needs to take: my body needed to hide.

I have been feeling a profound lack of safety, both related to where I live, but also related to where all black and brown people live in the us. There is no safe place.

I also needed to cry and grieve for Jamar Clark. I needed to give him, a stranger and a brother, that space. My therapist asked me what my wish was for Jamar.

I said, I wish for him that he has a sense of completion.

I said, I wish for him that he doesn't experience what happened as something stolen from him, but that he experiences it as his complete life.

I said, I wish that we who survive, that we are the ones who carry the burden of knowing otherwise, not him.

This may all end. No, it will. Unquestionably. The way we humans have organized ourselves throughout time just keeps evolving. That's the good part. But this latest evolution is dangerous. We are tipping between all out fascism and the possibility of liberation. As Ta-Nehisi Coates said, the arc of history bends towards chaos. We cannot know what the future holds and we cannot trust that in the end justice will be served. We know too much.

We have to fight. Every. Day. If you are standing on the sidelines I am asking you, for myself and for my children. Join me. It is too exhausting to be a target and to know that my children are too. That the best I can do is protect them while they are in my care and teach them to protect themselves.

And yes, I am not safe. Neither are my children. Neither are yours. White supremacy and fascism and capitalism will be indiscriminate in the end. In the end, the survivors of all this warring, unmoored in their tiny boat, adrift on a ravaged sea, will have watched so many children drowning that their souls will go into hiding. The hard truth is that you won't get to be human any more. Not if you stand on the sidelines.

It is our duty to fight.
It is our duty to win.
We have nothing to lose but our chains.

Be well-Autumn

 

 

Hello good people~

Yesterday I spent the beginning of my Therapy session huddled on the floor under a pile of blankets. I see a somatic therapist so a big part of what we do is following the shape that the body needs to take: my body needed to hide.

I have been feeling a profound lack of safety, both related to where I live, but also related to where all black and brown people live in the us. There is no safe place.

I also needed to cry and grieve for Jamar Clark. I needed to give him, a stranger and a brother, that space. My therapist asked me what my wish was for Jamar.

I said, I wish for him that he has a sense of completion.

I said, I wish for him that he doesn't experience what happened as something stolen from him, but that he experiences it as his complete life.

I said, I wish that we who survive, that we are the ones who carry the burden of knowing otherwise, not him.

This may all end. No, it will. Unquestionably. The way we humans have organized ourselves throughout time just keeps evolving. That's the good part. But this latest evolution is dangerous. We are tipping between all out fascism and the possibility of liberation. As Ta-Nehisi Coates said, the arc of history bends towards chaos. We cannot know what the future holds and we cannot trust that in the end justice will be served. We know too much.

We have to fight. Every. Day. If you are standing on the sidelines I am asking you, for myself and for my children. Join me. It is too exhausting to be a target and to know that my children are too. That the best I can do is protect them while they are in my care and teach them to protect themselves.

And yes, I am not safe. Neither are my children. Neither are yours. White supremacy and fascism and capitalism will be indiscriminate in the end. In the end, the survivors of all this warring, unmoored in their tiny boat, adrift on a ravaged sea, will have watched so many children drowning that their souls will go into hiding. The hard truth is that you won't get to be human any more. Not if you stand on the sidelines.

It is our duty to fight.
It is our duty to win.
We have nothing to lose but our chains.

Be well-Autumn

 

 

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